Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
