No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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