He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize