i need an iv and a liver transplant
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
