It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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