I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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