Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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