Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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