Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Non-Jews are for practice
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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