Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
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