your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
