he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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