Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Farmville is her only friend.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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