i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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