Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize