i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
