Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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