Will you blow on my dice?
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Randomize
