yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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