brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
