Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
