I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
