ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
