it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Randomize
