Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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