just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
