member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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