Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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