One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
