He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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