you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
