What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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