I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I just forgot I was standing up.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
