how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
