you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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