When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
