Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
