i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
