so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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