i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Barsexuality is the new black.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Randomize
