i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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