a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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