Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
