We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
