Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
