well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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