we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
