We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
and eventually we just all took our pants off
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
