Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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