You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
